In a Funk

For the past few months since EC has started, I've been in a funk. I feel like I haven't been getting things out of the prayer time like I should be, I haven't been reading my Bible...at all. I just feel like I haven't been in "the flow of things" kind of what like Pastor Beth taught on at this weekend's service. I mean I go through the motions...I try to get stuff out of ESOM and weekend services, but nothing seems to stick or get through to me. I feel like my river has been gummed up, and as Pastor Beth would say, those little dam beaver demons have done their thing. I don’t want to do through just the motions though, I want to feel the Lord’s spirit. Pastor Beth talked about the five things that can clutter the heart. I have definitely been feeling two of those things lately…those being guilt and fear. Guilt for not being a good Christian like I should be…for not being genuine and solely focused on Him and what He wants us to be focused on. Fear…fear of not being able to get out of this funk…fear of never being good enough…fear of the future and what God has for me and what he wants me to do…fear of growing up and what to do next year and the years to come…fear of what I should do school wise…fear…fear…fear. I know it’s from the enemy but it’s hard to get out of a habit if you’ve been doing it and listening to it for so long.